Parental Control
by GhostHelwig
Summary: Sometimes learning takes a lifetime. Even for a genius like Eddward. Rated Kplus for absolutely nothing.


Disclaimer- I do not own or profit from Ed, Edd N Eddy. The Eds belong to the wonderful Danny Antonucci, not me. Rated Kplus for absolutely nothing but angst.

Author's Note- I don't know how or why I decided to start yet _another_ Eds multi-chapter story. But this one will, hopefully, be shorter than the others. It was inspired by thinking about Double D, about whom it is pretty much exclusively centered...

The memory this fic uses as a jumping off point occurs in the episode "Every Which Way But Ed" from Season 5. Also, while the Eds' ages can only be guessed at (and Ed in diapers - and possibly Eddy, too - implies perhaps a younger age than I gave them), I went with the age I did simply because it seemed the most likely to me, given the fact that Eddy was already scamming and he and Ed were left outside presumably on their own. I also chose it because I've been left with the impression Double D attended at least a little bit of school before moving to the cul-de-sac, so I gave him kindergarten. I hope my choice bothers no one.

Anyway, enjoy. Peace, all.

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**Parental Control**

_Chapter One - Age Six_

by Ghost Helwig

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It was a simple thing, really. But it made little Eddward terribly excited. They'd just moved to a new neighborhood to accommodate his father's new job supervising the lab downtown, and on his very first day not full of unpacking and scrubbing down every surface, he'd made new friends. Ed and Eddy, their names were, and he was practically bubbling over with excitement waiting for his parents to come home from work so he could tell them of his first successful friendships.

The day took a bad turn when his mother was late by half an hour - Eddward was watching the clock, listening to his babysitter talking to her boyfriend on the telephone, and he knew being late would throw off his mother's whole schedule. It would give her only an hour to prepare for his father's eventual arrival, and that was an hour that had to encompass bathing, cooking, double-checking to see that Eddward had finished all the chores laid out on sticky notes around the house, and picking out her clothes for her next day of work. Eddward knew she'd be cross if he interrupted, so he made the salad, put the dinner rolls in the oven so they'd have time to cook and cool before his father returned home, and stayed out of her way.

His father came home right on time. He was always right on time. Eddward couldn't remember a day in which his father was late for anything. It was as if work and traffic, indeed the whole world, rearranged to fit his father's schedule.

Eddward admired that. It was a gift his father possessed, like his brilliant mind - and both were gifts Eddward was sure he would never share.

But on this day, he didn't mind so much.

His mother was able to do all she needed to do before his father returned, so everything was running smoothly all the way through dinner. His parents discussed Important Adult Things (that "_you'll understand when you're older, Eddward_"), his father's workload, his mother's - and during a sweet dessert (a rare treat, and a good sign) his father finally cast a glance in his direction. Was it time for him to share his news? They seemed in good enough moods...

"Your mother tells me you forgot to straighten the linen closet today, Eddward."

What? Really? He cast his mind frantically back over the events of the day. He remembered finding the sticky note, and heading to the closet-

And hearing the doorbell ring. Meeting Ed and Eddy.

_Oh no._

"I'm sorry, Father." He'd been so excited, but how could he ever justify forgetting to do his _chores_? "You see, I-"

"No excuses, young man." His father pushed his glasses up the bridge of his nose with a forefinger, and the look in his eyes as he stared down at his son made Eddward wither inside. He hated making his father angry.

"After dinner you'll straighten up. I understand the excitement of moving to a new house, but that's why getting back into the routine quickly is so important. I don't want any son of mine to be lazy."

Eddward flinched. He didn't want to be lazy. From his father's mouth, it sounded like the worst thing one could be.

"No, father."

"You won't be punished this time, but see that you don't forget again. Do you understand me, Eddward?"

"Yes, father."

"Good."

His father turned back to his bowl of non-fat yogurt, and Eddward turned to smile tremulously at his mother, hoping for some show of support, even just a kind look. She frowned at him, and said nothing.

Tears pricked Eddward's eyes, but an unfamiliar emotion tugged at his belly. It was warm... Pulsing. He kind of wanted to... To _defy_ his parents. He couldn't pinpoint why, but he wanted to.

With that recklessness still running through his veins, he decided to tell them his news. He wanted to share it. Maybe they'd even be happy for him.

And the happy thoughts of Ed and Eddy helped clear the ugly taste from his mouth that had stolen all the sweetness of his dessert away.

"I made friends today," he said, trying to put more power into his trembling voice. "Two children from the neighborhood. It's funny, too." He laughed a little, smiling a bit more strongly now. "Their names are-"

"Eddward, please." His father's voice ran right over his. "I've had a long day. So has your mother. Do not bother us with trivialities."

_...Oh._

That... Hurt. Eddward stared, but his father didn't appear to notice. He continued eating, and Eddward watched the spoon lifting to his mouth over and over again. He was no longer at all hungry.

"Mother," he whispered. "May I be excused?"

She agreed without looking at him. Eddward pushed away from the table, carefully pushed his chair back into place, then walked away.

It took everything he had to not run.

He'd never felt so... Small, before. Small, and unwelcome in his own home. And he'd had such a wonderful morning, too (even if he had lost two quarters to his new friends' reason-defying scheme).

It was such a simple thing. Such a small betrayal. But it showed Eddward exactly what he could expect from his parents for the rest of his life.

Not that he'd know that, or believe it, for years to come.


End file.
